by Presence

With maturity there might be sadness…

When you slow down enough to observe yourself and how you have acted and what it means… you discover the immaturity that you previously exhibited.

Then you may nor may not realize that that is how the people who you have interacted with immaturely view you no matter what.  Often times opinions aren’t changed as easily as they are created.

Whenever you see them you remember that they already expect something petty out of you.  Your image to them becomes your image of yourself.  Now instead of simply being happy you conserve your words and movements to prevent doing something else immature, or perhaps to look for ways to act or speak to prove that you have matured.  There is a great deal of stress in this.  And now even though seeing that you have been immature is maturity in itself, you refuse to relax in a hopeless quest to prove something that just is.

There is no proving it.  When the time is right, and when you aren’t trying, the new you will shine forth…

…because there is no way of knowing how another mind truly views you.  The image that you believe you have created for yourself in another mind is created in your own mind.  If you know you are mature, truly, then you don’t feel the need to prove it… you don’t need anything.  Knowing itself is enough.